The Heart of the Matter

Last night our family had the privilege of participating in a unique worship experience at our church. It was an intimate worship service directed solely at God, and led by children. My son, Jack, served as a prayer leader. My eldest daughter, Mary Catherine, served as a worship leader. This experience was absolutely remarkable to me as I got to witness, first hand, my children being led by the Holy Spirit and serving the Lord with such purity of heart.

Children leading adults in worship to God! What a concept! Oddly, as I was worshipping and observing all of this I suddenly heard the words of Don Henley in my head, "I been tryin' to get down, to the heart of the matter." I guess God can speak through Don Henley as well as He can through anyone else. It was as though the Lord was reminding me that I need to be concerned with training my children's hearts and not just their behavior. When their hearts are in tune with God, it's such a beautiful thing!

1 Samuel 16:7, "For the LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart." Much of the time, I have to admit, I am more concerned with the outward appearance of my children. Seems I frequently remind them to watch their words, mind their manners, straighten up and fly right. What I really mean is, 'Whatever you do don't embarrass me'! (ha!) However, God makes it clear in His Word that it's the heart condition that matters most to Him not the outward appearance.

What matters most, what really counts, is reaching the heart of our children and not just controlling behavior. Behavior is affected by what's in the heart. This is true in my own life. When my heart is connected to God in relationship with Him, it directly affects my decisions and my behavior.

Mark 7:21 states: " . . . from within, out of men's hearts, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, greed, malice, deceit, lewdness, envy, slander, arrogance and folly." Yikes, do you see that all of these aweful things begin in a persons heart before they make their way to the outward behavior?

What our children say and do is a reflection of what is in their hearts. Again, Luke 6:45 corroborates this point: "The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks."

Outward behavior is the itch we're constantly wanting to scratch but we can't let it sidetrack us and stop there. When children argue over who sits where in the car, it's not about seating. It's about selfishness and pride. Our natural state is prideful and self-centered.

As family author, Ted Tripp says, "You must learn to work from the behavior you see back to the heart, exposing heart issues for your children. In short, you must learn to engage them, not just reprove them. Help them to see the ways that they are trying to quench their souls' thirst with that which cannot satisfy. You must help your kids gain a clear focus on the cross of Christ."

This topic may seem a little vague but I hope not. This is where we really get down to building up children in the true image of Christ! Of those who were seemingly "good" on the outside, Jesus saw right through, "These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me." Moms, let us raise a generation of children who truly honor God with their hearts as well as their lips!