Who vs. Why

For the past five months I've been teaching freshman girls discipleship class at a Christian school.  Some of the girls come from healthy families while others come from homes so dysfunctional I wonder how they make it to school each day.  The children who attend the Christian school are no different from the children who attend public school.  The difference is in the environment.  We, as teachers, are trying to make Christianity contagious.  We have lesson plans, yes, but more than that we hope our own relationship with Jesus is evident and desireable.  It is often said that Christianity is caught more than taught.  This teaching job has rekindled a fire in me to see the next generation put their trust in God and see Him do amazing things in their lives.

While I love my job, I have to admit it can be painful.  At times my girls make choices I know will lead to trouble but I feel powerless to prevent it.  Like a mother, I want to wrap them in my arms and protect them from the dangers of this world.  Having lived longer, I know what's out there and I want to shield them from the darkness.  It's about this time the Lord reminds me He is in control.  It's not my place to keep them locked up in some sort of Christian vault but rather to prepare them for His service to a hurting world.

Pain was not part of God's plan when He created man.  We are responsible for that.  However, God is so amazing He can take pain and turn it into something beautiful.   In the story of Job, when he lost everything - his belongings plus all ten of his children in one day - his friends tried everything they could to explain the 'why' of what happened.  In the end the 'why' didn't matter.  It was the 'who' - or should I say 'Who'. 

Out of the approximately 31,000 verses in the Bible, Job 42:5 is one of my top favorites.  After all of the discussion on why bad things happen, God came to Job and allowed Job to see Him in a powerful way.  Job had never experienced God like he did after his terrible tragedy.  God spoke to Job like He had never done before.  God didn't explain the 'why' but He revealed the 'Who' so well that Job didn't ask any more questions.  He just marveled.  Job's response to God's revelation of Himself was, "My ears had heard of you but now my eyes have seen you." (Job 42:5)

We've experienced so much sadness and pain over the past week.  It seems like everyday there is more bad news.  My natural tendency is to ask 'why?'  But what I need to seek is the 'Who'.  My prayer for us in the wake of tragedy is to see God in such a way that the 'why' is no longer the issue.  May God stand before you as He did for Job.  May God's love overshadow our pain. 

It's not coincidence that the book of Psalms follows the story of Job.  "Weeping may last for a night but joy comes in the morning", Psalm 30:5. 

Don't Hand a Blind Man a Map

By Chris Archinal

It must have been 1991.  I was the Assoc Youth Minister at FBC Lubbock while attending Texas Tech University.  FBC was 3 blocks from the campus so it was easy for me to park my Jeep CJ-5 at the church and simply ride my bike to class.  One afternoon, my twin brother, Jason, was running late for class.  Instead of fighting to find a parking place he parked at the church and borrowed my bike.  A few hours later he returned.  He came to my office and when I saw his face I could tell something was wrong.  I asked him what was bothering him and he told me this story.  

After class Jason was unlocking my bike from the rack and I guess the noise he made as he loosened the lock caught the attention of a blind man who was standing nearby with his dog.  The man, looking like a stereotypical blind person, complete with the stick, dark glasses and dog, looked Jason's direction.  He said, "Excuse me, could you help me?  I seemed to have lost my way." As it turns out the man was headed to the library and through a series of wrong turns he was totally lost.  Of course, Jason stopped what he was doing and immediately helped him.  Jason took him by the arm and walked him towards the library until he looked at Jason and said, "Ah, now I know where I am.  Thank you for the help, and have a great day."  Jason double-checked, maybe even triple-checked to make sure he was certain to continue on alone and watched the man as he navigated across the street and down the sidewalk that led to the library.  Jason watched as the man made his way up the library steps and only when he had safely entered in did he go back to the bike rack.  

I'll never forget the expression on Jason's face as he told me this story.  His eyes filled with tears, choking back the frog that seemed to have nestled in his throat.  Then he asked me, "What do you think I am supposed to learn from that?"  We sat and talked about the obvious lesson, which is to be grateful everyday for something we so take for granted...our sight.  But digging deeper God revealed something more.  You see, we encounter spiritually blind people everyday...people that don't know Jesus.  And whether they ask us outright, or just with their actions, many are saying, "Excuse me, could you help me?  I seemed to have lost my way."  So what do we do when we see someone who is lost...someone who has lost their way?  

Draw a map: Jason, knowing the campus layout very well, could have drawn the man a very nice map.  He could have handed the man the map and said, "Here are step by step directions...good luck!"

Point: Jason could have put his hand on the guys shoulder and pointed saying, "Yup...you wanna go that way."

Verbal instructions:  "No, no, you're waaaay off.  If you want to go to the library you need to...." and then proceed to describe to the man exactly what he needed to do.  

 The bottom line (and ridiculously obvious) truth about those options is....they AREN'T options.  You would never do those things for a blind man.  A map is no good to someone who can't see.  Pointing is just as worthless.  And verbal instructions only make him feel more embarrassed.  The ONLY option Jason had was to do what he did.  To take the man by the arm and "lead him" to the library.  

You want to help those who are blind to Christ?  Assist those who have lost their way?  Lead them.  Don't write down a bunch of scripture and tell them to "follow this Roman road to salvation."  Don't just point them to church, telling them that's where they can "find their way," and don't preach at them using churchy terms they won't understand.  Instead, lead them.  Is it wrong to share scripture, point them to church or verbally share your faith?  Of course not.  In fact, those are definitely supplements to sharing your faith.  But the very best thing you can do is walk through life with them, helping them find their way...God's way.  

Oh, and by the way, you won't be so lucky to have someone walk up and say, "I'm a sinner, what must I do to be saved?"  Your blind person will come to you with life questions, real pain, a financial or marital crisis, or the like.  Each hurt, each issue, each cry out is their way of looking to someone they think can help saying, "Excuse me, could you help me?  I seemed to have lost my way." 

 

Pick on Someone Your Own Size

As a child there was a boy on our street who was just a year or two older than me.  He was at least a foot taller but very lanky and didn't weigh much more than I did.  He loved to pick on me and my friends.  He would annoy us when we were playing house.  He threw pebbles at us when we rode our bikes.  He made fun of us at the bus stop.  My friends and I didn't see that there was anything we could do about it.  We felt pretty powerless.

That is until one day when my much older brother saw what was going on.  Now, you need to understand that my brother, Andy, wanted nothing to do with me.  My brother was much meaner to me than this kid.  However, when he was coming home from high school one day, my big brother witnessed this neighbor kid messing with us.

Before I knew what was happening, Andy grabbed this kid by the shirt collar and told him he'd better pick on someone his own size.  Something to the effect of: "There's a new sherriff in town so scram!"  My friends and I just looked at each other, jaws dropped, and let it sink in.  Here was Andy, who had no use for us, coming to our rescue!  We were liberated!  We were free from the tyranny of the neighborhood bully!  Victory!

Now that I am an adult I struggle with other bullies in my life.  Unfortunately, they are not as easy to control as the street bully.  Ephesians 6:12 explains, "For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places."  Friends, we are fighting bullies we cannot see.

Yesterday, a bully tried to pick on me.  My husband, Chris, had something very stressful happen at work that felt threatening to his future and hence, our family.  At first we felt fearful, powerless and defeated.  We were angry with the people who seemed to be causing this problem until we remembered Ephesians 6. 

We immidiately stopped and prayed.  There's only one person more formidable than a big brother - Big Daddy!  Matthew 7:11 explains it best, "If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!"  We cried out to our Heavenly Father to come to our rescue.  Only the Lord can set evil in it's proper place.  As soon as we prayed and confessed our trust in God, we experienced peace.

Later the same day, Chris got a call from someone with knowledge and influence in this situation and gave us some very reassuring words.  The man's encouragement was appreciated and reinforced our faith that God is at work on our behalf. 

What bullies are you facing today? It may look like a person or a circumstance that is threatening you but look a little deeper. We don't have to sit back and let physical or spiritual bullies paralyze us. Call on Big Daddy. Put your hope in God. Keep your focus on Him and watch Him stand up for you. 

Go Ahead and Blink

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It's been a LONG time since I wrote on my blog. Perhaps it's an indication of my current stage of life. I love speaking and writing but where is the time to do it??? I am baffled by these Christian women authors who have written five books (even one book) and still have children living at home. Clearly, I need a class in time management. But there again, where do I find the time to take it?! ha!

So here it is, December 31st, again. Weren't we just here?! Is it my imagination or does each succeeding Christmas season go by faster than the one before? As my children get older (and hence, I get older) time is speeding up. Better not blink!

As Ellie and I were taking down decorations this morning, we saw our advent calendar sitting there, a long standing Archinal tradition. We got through December 15 and the remainder of those little doors stayed shut. A sign of our busy schedules.

Not only did some of our long-standing traditions get lost in the busyness but we had several friends experience tragedy and loss this season. Our hearts have been with them. At times, it seemed the joy of the season was a little harder to come by. So, did we miss Christmas? If we didn't get to all the things we've done before, does it mean we experienced Christmas less?

This mother's heart was feeling a little low at the reality of older children, busier schedules, and hurting friends. Then, once again, God was there to share a word of encouragement. He speaks to me in 2 Corinthians 1:3-4, "Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God." He comforts my heart.

He reminds me that even though time is fleeting, children grow up, and family schedules shift, He is ever constant. He is outside of time and holds all things together. He holds our family together. He holds my grieving friends in a way that I cannot. He holds me together when the inertia of demands and responsibilities tries to pull me apart.


Christmas 2011 has come and gone. Some of our traditions shifted a little but we were all together. We made some new and wonderful memories that we'll cherish forever. We had the privilege of praying for and comforting hurting friends.

Yes, I blink and another year is passed. But, no matter how many times I blink, each time I open my eyes there is my loving family and there is my loving God. So as you are packing up another year, go ahead and blink. Years come and go but joy remains.

What can you do with duct tape?

If memory serves, it seems that around the time I discovered boys I also learned about duct tape. Doesn't it just seem like men and duct tape go together? Some of our dearest friends have a 14-year-old son who just loves duct tape. He uses it on just about everything. Got a tent with a hole in it? Use duct tape. Electrical cord got a short? Duct tape. Looking for a new baseball cap? Make one out of duct tape! (He seriously did this.) As a matter of fact, for his birthday, this young man asked for one thing....new rolls of duct tape.

Did you know you can buy it in a wide assortment of colors and patterns? Yes, duct tape is magical. Maybe duct tape is the 8th wonder of the world. I'm led to believe that if a nuclear bomb hit and the world as we know it ceased to exist, cockroaches and duct tape would still survive!

There are times in my life when I could really use some emotional duct tape. When I feel like I'm unraveling, somebody needs to patch me up with fluorescent pink duct tape (one of the many colors for sale at Ace Hardware).

Back-to-school season is one of those times. Our family enjoys awesome summers. We load up on sunshine and family time. Then, just when we've finally shaken off that last shred of tension from the previous school year - BAM! - it's time to start all over again. The older my kids get the more I dread school starting. It's like I can see the hands on the clock moving at super speed, threatening to make my kids grow up before I am ready.

This is when God reminds me that He's my emotional duct tape. Look at this - "He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together." (Colossians 1:17) YES! God is my duct tape! Jesus holds me together when I see my kids growing up too soon. He holds me together when they start wanting to spend more time with friends and less time with mom. He holds me together when my son no longer wants me to walk him to class on the first day of school.

Tonight, Jack asked me to scratch his back as he settled into bed. The lights were off and you could hear the comforting rumble of distant thunder. As I sat on the edge of his bed rubbing his back, he began to share about his day.

This may sound crazy, but I just sat there listening and thought about the duct tape. I thought about how, yes, someday he'll be too old to ask me to rub his back to help him sleep. He'll be too big to want to have me near when he's drifting off. He won't always want to share about his day, perhaps. And as my heart begins to break at the thought of my boy growing up too soon, Jesus is also there.

He's speaking His promises to me. He's reminding me of His faithfulness to my children as they grow up in Him. He holds all my precious memories of the past and helps me focus on all of the memories yet to be made. Will it break my heart when my boy is no longer a boy? I imagine in some ways it will.

But Jesus is already there in that moment holding my heart together...just like duct tape.

Keep Calm and Carry On

It was one of those days. You've had days like this. The weight of the world was resting squarely on my weak, brittle shoulders. My anxiety was focused on this one issue over which I had no control. The more I tried to push it to the back of my mind or shake it off, the more this worry forced it's way into my stomach, churning and wrenching as it went.

Ironically, I was in my happy place - Target, when it struck. Target is my Mecca. It's where I go when I need a little lift. I walk through those red sliding doors, smell that familiar retail store scent, see the "Expect More. Pay Less." catchphrase and I feel... home.

Normally when I go to Target I'm there to get just one or two items. Nothing too sexy, just toilet paper or toothpaste. But what ends up happening every time? I walk out $200 later with that cute top, seasonal decor or those adorable new place mats for the kids. Today, however, was different. Completely determined to go in and get ONLY what I needed, I walked with particular determination.

I went right to the stationary aisle and picked up some thank you cards. I chose the least expensive that were still tasteful but I made the mistake of allowing myself to look around. My eyes glanced longingly at the new summer shorts & T's for my girls, the new 4th of July decorations that would be so cute for our family reunion. I cried out (in my mind, not out loud), "Lord, help!"

This weighty issue I had been trying to avoid, reared it's ugly head. I could hear the enemy's accusations in my ear, "What if God doesn't come through?" "What if He lets you down this time?" As if satan had his own slogan, "Expect NO More. Pray Less."

I could have wallowed in those lies but instead I chose to take them directly to God. Right there in Target I brought my concern to the King of Kings. I confessed to the Lord that I believed He is faithful in all circumstances. I asked Him to help me at this weak moment of worry. You know what happened then?

I was walking through the home decor section when I looked up and there it was. A brightly painted canvas wall hanging that read, "Keep Calm and Carry On." There was even a crown painted at the top as if it came on God's letterhead. I felt my worry melt into peace. As God's Spirit ministered to me in that moment, I sensed God saying, "You made the right choice." Instead of succumbing to the enemies lies, I took my concerns directly to the throne. I chose to confess my shaky faith in a strong and capable God.

Next time the weight of the world is bearing down on your shoulders, even if it's in Target, take it to the Throne of Grace and drop it off. You'll stand a little taller and perhaps you'll hear God say to you, as He did to me, "Keep Calm and Carry On."

Now, where to hang that canvas painting....