Boundary Lines

My son, Jack, has become obsessed with football in the past year. He loves to go in the front yard with my husband, Chris, and play quarterback. There are two things Jack always asks when getting ready to play a game. 1. Where's the football? 2. Where are the boundary lines? It's important to know the boundaries of the playing field so you'll know when you're about to step out of bounds. It's also important so you'll know when you've scored a touchdown.

Our sons crave boundaries. It may seem like they don't, but they do. Have you ever noticed your son and his friends making up new games and they spend half the time deciding what the rules are going to be? Proverbs 29:17 says, "Correct your son, and he will give you rest. Yes, he will be a delight to your soul." Aaaaah, that sounds good, doesn't it? Here's the question of the day: Is your son a delight to your soul? If not, it could be because he's longing for boundaries that you have yet to set or enforce.

When teaching our sons to be accountable, we need to make our expectations clear then establish concrete consequences for not following those expectations. Without clear boundaries and the enforcement of them, our sons can become unaccountable in their adult lives and find themselves in great distress.

Boys need to know they are accountable to parents, teachers, coaches, other adults and to God. Left to their own devices, boys will make up their own set of rules and has anyone read the book, "Lord of the Flies"? Scary! Boys must learn from an early age that mom won't bail them out when they have broken the boundary lines. They must see there are positive and negative consequences for their actions.

An unknown author said, "A child that is allowed to be disrespectful to his parents will not have true respect for anyone." I think deep down we, as mothers, know this is true. Yet we can sometimes struggle with rule enforcement when our precious little boys look up at us with those sweet eyes. Stand strong for the sake of your son!

If you want a son who is truly at peace, then show him clearly where the boundary lines are and blow the whistle when he steps out of those bounds. Soon he'll learn how to play within them and he'll be running straight toward the goal line instead.